New Year Marriage Resolutions
On New Year’s Eve Anna and I watched our kids and a handful of others whirl bright sparklers in the air, each leaving a brief trail of color and smoke. Such joy and hope ringing in the New Year! Anna and I would like to offer you a few sparklers of our own that have the potential to bring joy and hope to your marriage this New Year.
So here are five sparklers to light in your marriage this New Year! Choose one or all, but regardless begin 2018 with some spark.
Go on an Adventure
Anna and I mean exactly that-adventure! We are talking something new, never-done-before, out-of-your-comfort-zone adventuring! It can cost a lot, a little, or nothing, but the point is as a couple it is worth your marriage to do some adventuring together. It includes many benefits, not least are laughter, fun, connection, and sharing an experience you have never done before.
Adventuring doesn’t have to be costly or time consuming (although some things require a healthy amount of time.). Here is a list of ideas:
Horseback riding, hiking, Segway tour, cooking class together, weekend away at a bed and breakfast, etc.
You get the idea!
Develop Friendships with Other Married Couples Make a commitment to invest in friendships with other married couples. Life has an incredible way of inserting responsibilities and tasks to keep us busy as long as we allow it, so being intentional to invest in adult friendships and schedule double dates or
group activities together is a sure way to release you from the rigors of routine.
Enjoying a variety of friendships can bless a marriage with depth of conversation, laughter, and new adventure that may not have been explored on our own. Friends have a beautiful way of influencing our growth as individuals and as couples.
Pray Together More
Before you quickly move on to number four, hear me for a moment. Guys (yes, I referring to husbands) we can tend to put this one off for another day, or another year; it always seems to be on the horizon, just out of reach. So, this year commit with your wife to pray more together, and not just spontaneously (that too), but intentional planned time. Set a time each day, or once a week to pray with one another. Praying with one another has the potential to take your intimacy to new heights, or even overcome hurdles in intimacy you have encountered in the past. We often let shame of our past failures keep us from growing in new ways with our spouses, don’t let it this year! God’s grace is sufficient for you!
Talk About Important Things (and laugh)
Commit to have important conversations together this year! Don’t allow the business of life hold your conversations to the mundane. No, talk about important things, like, parenting, dreams, the Bible, Jesus, plans to get away with each other, sex, disappointments, stresses, joys, and by all means laugh a lot together.
Anna and I have some of our best conversations in the kitchen while we are cooking. They are often spontaneous, but no less meaningful.
I can’t encourage this enough. You know how we can stew over conflict (sometimes for days)? Initially we are imaging all the things we should have said or plan to say, all while we passively ignore our spouse. We don’t talk; we barely look at each other. Stop that business. Recognize your responsibility in the conflict, own up to it, and ask for forgiveness. The sooner the better.
Make a commitment this year to handle conflict more graciously; moving towards reconciliation through forgiveness soon than later.